Supporting a Student with a Learning Disability When the Parents Refuse to Accept It
As a former educator, we are trained to recognize when something isn’t quite clicking for a student. A couple of years ago, I taught English in another country with students ranging from 4-9 years old. I had this one student I remember teaching over the course of that year and a half. During that time, patterns emerged, and it pointed to a possible learning disability for that student.
However, I was teaching in a country where disabilities were not acknowledged, and while the other kids progressed with the study material, this student was often far behind his peers.
So, what happens when the student’s parents refuse to accept that their child may have a learning challenge?
It’s one of the most complex challenges a teacher can face, especially when teaching English in a country with language barriers, and cultural beliefs may further complicate the situation.
In this instance, teachers that are teaching overseas are often seen as temporary, so it was often difficult to approach the subject with parents. In my experience, the tension between what I saw in the classroom and what the family was willing to acknowledge created an ongoing ache. I knew the student needed more support, but I also knew I had to approach it carefully and respectfully.
Here's what I’ve learned about how to support students in this difficult, delicate space.
1. Lead With Strengths, Frame With Care
Start by recognizing what the students does well. Every student has strengths, and naming them first builds trust. When it’s time to address concerns, I frame them as opportunities for growth rather than deficits.
2. Build Trust Slowly and Respectfully
Parental resistance often comes with fear that their child will be labeled, judged, or excluded. I taught in a country where education was extremely competitive, and any disadvantage could mean missed opportunities for their child. Help the parents see that you want the student to succeed.
3. Keep the Door Open
Even if parents continue to resist, never close the door. Continue to advocate quietly, consistently, and compassionately. In the end, it’s about supporting the student as best we can, within the limits we have.
Final Thoughts
Taking all of that in mind, I have to recognize that teachers are overworked and underpaid. How can I focus so much attention on one student when I have a classroom full of others that also need me?
Supporting one student who requires extra attention can feel overwhelming when you’re responsible for an entire classroom. It’s important to remember that it’s about equity, not equality. Not every student needs the same kind of support and giving one child more focused help doesn’t mean others are being neglected.
By using class-wide strategies like visual aids, clear routines, and structured group work, you can support all learners while still creating space for targeted interventions. Peer support, student independence, and flexible grouping can also lighten the load and foster a more inclusive environment.
While you can’t meet every need perfectly every day, small, intentional actions can make a profound difference in a student’s life. Teaching isn’t about doing everything at once; it’s about doing what matters most, moment by moment.
